going to (a particular) college?

hello there ☺
i'm a third grader of high school now. it's time to make a huge decision.
a really really important one. COLLEGE LIFE. aargh (-,-)
well, I'm not good to tell it by a sequence writing. so, let me share it with Q&A mode. enjoy!

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Q: are you going to continuing your education on college?
A: yes. Insya Allah. absolutely. I really mean it.

Q: how far is your limit point to decide it?
A: err about 8 months maybe?

Q: are you ready? i mean now, this time, literally?
A: okay. this is complicated.
for the being a college student, i am so ready.
but before that, for competiting at UAN and SPMB or PMDK or SNMPTN etc., i'm not ready. yet.

Q: what will you do to fix that?
A: pushing my limit. getting closer to Allah (amiin). and change my habits.
my whole habits that have correlation to my success.

Q: do you believe you can do that?
A: YES. YES. I TRUST ALLAH, I TRUST MYSELF, I TRUST MY FAMILY.

Q: have you considered about its cost?
A: about the money, i do. and it's really freaking me nuts.
paying for a college fee is like burning our parent's money. (although it's obviously done w/ great payback)
that's why i'll try to get a scholarship. i really want a scholarship :(

Q: err.. what about your family and friends?
A: family? they're obviously support me in every single time. i have a great prime family. and a great big family too.
about friends, i love them. much. so so. but it's time to be independent. i mean, i will not depend on friends in taking chances to continue my own struggle.
beside, they're (literally) still my competitor too :p

Q: and your crush?
A: he has been supporting me for the last 2 years and i believe whatever it is, he believe that i can choose a good way under the blessing of my parent and Allah SWT.
it's a kind of LDR but i think we're gonna be fine because we're not physically bounded. we're a great partner, a best friend, and it'll always be the same straight way. we're moslem. may Allah blessed us. amin ☺

Q: so, you're confident enough to start your struggle now?
A: confident? I don't know.
i just try to be strong. brave, and well prepared. i think it's gonna be followed by the confidence.

Q: well, i think it's enough. isn't it?
A: LOL~ whatever



Q: one last question, where have you planned to study next actually?
A: i dont know yet. seriously. curious? better you just wait and see ;)